Apr 30, 2016

Saturday Snippets


This explains everything I feel about moving to a new state...

Just bought this wipe clean workbook to keep Zianne busy at home this summer...

I liked this advice on how to write a condolence note...

On serving a child with special needs...

Acknowledging grief anniversaries...

I'm all for simple childhood...

On the other side of suffering...

100 years of engagement rings {a quick, fun video...}

I know I just bought a bucket bag, but I love this striped one too!

Experts share their top productivity tools...

Eyeing some teething necklaces because the girls keep ruining my jewelry (blush option // gold option)...

Thinking these gorgeous round towels perfectly complement our new California lifestyle...

Costco's organic initiative is super interesting...

Science indicates some of the damaging effects of pornography consumption...

Honest talk about diversity {or lack thereof} in the reformed church...

Apr 27, 2016

Talitha Joy {ten months}


Growing // Talitha actually lost a few ounces during her nursing strike (down to 21 lbs. 5 ounces), but she's bounced back and feels heavier than ever. I'm guessing she's over 22 pounds by this point.

Eating // T is still nursing four times a day - around 8am, 12pm, 4pm, and 8pm, but I think she's getting ready to drop one of the mid-day feedings. It's crazy to think that we will be done-ish with nursing soon. She loves any and all table foods, and it's a challenge to keep enough fruits and veggies ready to go, so I don't hand her carbs and other processed stuff out of convenience.

Wearing // I pulled all the 12 month clothes out of her drawers last week, so she is fully in 18 month clothes as this point.

Doing // Clapping, waving, knowingly saying "mama" and "dada," scooting herself down off low furniture like our bed and the living room ottoman, getting her top two teeth

Loving // People-watching, playing in the Tupperware drawer, wrestling, crawling on the ground outside and getting filthy

Loathing // Still hates having her diaper or clothing changed... Also, does not like when I feel around her gums for new teeth

**Read other monthly updates here.

Apr 25, 2016

Dear Talitha {ten months}

Dear Talitha,

Four minutes.

That's how long you nursed yesterday morning. I know it was four minutes because I kept time on my phone. After that four minutes you refused milk the rest of the day. Today you didn't nurse at all.

You are on what they call a "nursing strike." This was only a vague concept to me before this week. I didn't really know what a strike entails or why they happen until you started arching your back and screaming at the very idea of breastfeeding a few days ago. After 9 1/2 months of nursing being the most regular and comforting rhythm of your day, now it's suddenly the worst thing that's ever happened to you.



I took you to the doctor to determine possible causes. She ruled out an ear infection. She ruled out thrush. Then she reached into your mouth and found the possible culprit... those big front teeth might finally be pushing through your gums. I can't see them yet, but I can feel one on the right side. Thankfully none of us remember how bad teething hurts, but I've heard people say it's the kind of pain some adults would visit the ER for. Poor girl.

I went into my pregnancy with you trying to keep an open mind and realistic expectations. My pregnancy, delivery, and baby stage with Zianne went so smoothly. We never had issues with her health, temperament, or development, but I knew not to expect that with every child. "Every baby is different," I repeated in my head often as my stomach grew and grew. I was prepared for different challenges with you... maybe you would struggle to eat or sleep or maybe I would have complications during labor. Anything was possible.

But then you came out and you were easier than I ever imagined. Zianne was a happy, easy baby, but you were even more laid-back. Your delivery was quick, you nursed well, and you slept well from the start. You were flexible about moving to a new state. You didn't even whimper when your first two bottom teeth popped up on Christmas Day. You've been my go-with-the-flow baby from the start. I kept waiting for possible problems to arise that would throw me for a loop as a second-time mom, but they never came. You've been a dream.



But now... suddenly... I don't know what to do. I finally understand the conflict of every mom out there who has had to make tough decisions about nursing or pumping or weaning, while battling guilt, helplessness, uncertainty, and hormones. Right now the pump is sitting out on the counter. I offer to nurse at every feeding, you refuse, and I turn on that blasted machine yet again. I am gearing myself up mentally for at least a month or two of exclusively pumping. I am wondering when I should introduce cow's milk. I am pondering if I should just go buy a can of formula. I'm praying this is truly just a "strike" and you return to nursing again like all the lactation consultants on Google say you will. I'm telling myself it will be okay even if this is the abrupt end to an era.

But mostly I feel inadequate to help you, my sweet girl. I know you are in pain. I know there is something wrong, but my "best" resource doesn't help. It's easy to feel like if I don't have milk to give you, I have nothing.

But I know that's not true. I have love for you. And my love is greater than milk, even the liquid gold variety. In love, I will keep pumping to feed you. Or in love, I will give it up and find another food source that works best for our whole family. We'll get through this baby girl. My love for you has no limit. You can keep time on a stopwatch if you want, but you'll see those seconds tick by forever.

All my love,
Mama

P.S. I am happy to report after 4-5ish days, the strike ended! But I thought I would post this any way, since I wrote it in the moment and it describes life with T-Bean at ten months of age.

Apr 23, 2016

Saturday Snippets


The half marathon training schedule I've {mostly} followed for my race next week...

These keepsake journals are so cool...

These slightly distressed (mid-rise!) jeans are on sale...

Wanting to dabble in the off-shoulder trend (or this one)...

How to read the Bible for yourself...

Gilmore Girls fans, this is funny (also, how did I miss this news?!)...

Espresso connoisseurs, a new place to add to the Seattle Travel Guide...

How to read more each year...

Appreciated this article on the intersection between reformed theology and Pentecostalism...

Just bought my first-ever designer handbag...
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